Getting a girl you like to talk to you is only the first step. The next step is to rack your brain to come up with interesting topics to keep her engaged in the conversation. Knowing how to talk to a girl and what topics to discuss is a crucial skill for every guy.
Talking to a girl you like is different from talking to one of your buddies. When talking to your buddies, there seem to be endless things to discuss: sports, movies, girls, and more. But when it comes to talking to girls, things can get tricky.
Unless you’re a natural talker, it’s likely that your nerves and anxiety will get the best of you, and you won’t be able to think of anything to say, especially if you really like the girl. And that’s precisely the last thing you want to happen: to sit in awkward, uncomfortable silence as you watch the opportunity to talk to her slip through your fingers.
How to Start the Conversation With Her
The first thing you should focus on is how to initiate a conversation with a girl. The key is to start the conversation off on the right foot if you want to leave a good impression. The best way to do this is to use an indirect approach.
Initiating conversations indirectly works best because it lets her know that you’re interested in having a conversation without sounding too personal or aggressive, making it easier to connect with her.
Below are three effective techniques for starting a conversation using an indirect approach:
- Comment and ask about something she’s holding or wearing. For instance, if she’s holding a drink at a bar, you can ask about the name of the drink, how she likes it, and if she has any good drink recommendations. If you’re at the beach and notice she’s wearing a unique hat, you can ask where she got it and compliment her on how great it looks. It’s all about paying attention to the details, even the smallest ones.
- Comment on something that is happening around both of you at the moment. For example, if you’re at a bar and there’s a band playing, comment on the singer’s voice or the music being played. If you’re both waiting for the bus, you can make a comment about the traffic. Look around you, and find something happening around you that you can talk about.
- Spill out a compliment. While this technique is a little more direct, it can be an effective way to initiate a conversation with the girl you like. However, be mindful of the compliment you give. Steer clear of obvious compliments that most guys would give her. Instead of complimenting her face or skin, talk about the color of her eyes or the tattoo on her shoulder. Be creative and unique with your compliment so that it sparks her interest.
How to Ask the Right Questions
Just as knowing the right topics to discuss is essential, knowing how to ask the right questions is equally important. Instead of asking questions that could lead to one-word answers, try to ask open-ended questions to prolong the conversation.
For example
- Instead of asking “Do you like surfing?”, you can ask “What are your hobbies?”
- Instead of asking “Do you like this song?”, you can ask “What kind of music do you like?”
- Instead of asking “Have you seen Game of Thrones?”, you can ask “What movies or series do you enjoy?”
Asking open-ended questions invites her to tell a story, and if she’s telling a story, it usually implies that she’s comfortable around you and willing to open up, which is a good start.
10 Interesting Topics To Keep a Girl Hooked in a Conversation
Alright, you’ve successfully started a conversation with her. Now, just relax and let the conversation flow and take its course. Talking about the weather is getting old and tiresome, so what else can you talk about? Coming up with topics to chat about can be challenging, but we’ve made it easy for you by listing ten amazing conversation starters that can spark great conversations!
1. Food and Drinks.
This works well when you’re at a bar or restaurant. It’s a good strategy to start with. Begin by talking about the food and drinks right in front of you. Ask her what she ordered and how she likes it. Then, share what you ordered and ask for her opinion on dessert.
2. Hobbies.
This is a classic but still works effectively. A person’s hobbies can reveal a lot about who they are. Simply ask her about her hobbies and share yours. Who knows? You might even have hobbies in common that you can enjoy together. And if not, there’s no harm in trying out new things.
3. Aspirations and Goals.
A person’s goals can reveal a lot about their personality. Ask her about her future plans, but avoid making it sound like a job interview. Remember, you’re trying to get to know her as a person, not as an employer looking to fill a position, so be careful about sounding like you’re interrogating her as this can make it harder for her to open up to you.
4. Work.
This can be a tricky topic to talk about, but it’s bound to come up sooner or later. Why not get it out in the open and get it over with? Just be careful, as it can be a sensitive subject. You don’t want to come across as arrogant by bragging about your job, even if you have a good one.
On the other hand, you don’t want to downplay your job if it’s less than impressive. Instead, share some details about what you do without mentioning your job position, and express your enjoyment for it (even if you don’t). Then, move the conversation to her line of work.
5. Pets and Animals.
Research studies have shown that many girls are fond of animals, particularly dogs. Additionally, these studies reveal that girls are more attracted to men who own pets. Dr. Deepak Jumani, a sexual health physician and counselor, suggests that, apart from physical attributes, women are drawn to men who possess emotional traits such as caring, compassion, and concern for others. Therefore, it is believed that a woman may find a man more attractive if he owns a pet.
6. Travel.
This is always an amazing topic to discuss. Start by telling her a funny story about a recent travel escapade to keep the conversation light. Then, you can start asking questions like where she has been and where she wants to go next. If you both have traveled to the same places, share your experiences as she shares hers.
7. TV and Movies.
You have to be careful with this one. You don’t want to come across as a couch potato who has watched every single TV show and movie out there. However, it’s still worth asking her what she watches and what she’s looking forward to seeing.
You never know, she might have seen some movies that you’ve watched too. This topic could also be a good opportunity to ask her out to see a movie together, if you’re feeling bold!
8. Conspiracy Theories.
While this topic isn’t for everyone, it can be entertaining to talk about conspiracy theories. However, it’s important to consider the topics you choose carefully. For example, you might ask her about her thoughts on who killed JFK, what she thinks happened to Johnny Gosch, or her opinions on UFO and Bigfoot sightings.
Remember, this is a topic where there’s no right or wrong answer, so have fun sharing your thoughts and opinions.
9. Life and Universe.
This is a huge subject, and it may not be easy to approach. However, it’s important to consider that intelligence is something that most women find attractive. This doesn’t necessarily mean you need to have a university degree, masters, or Ph.D. Intelligence can come in many forms: well-thought-out opinions, enlightening insights, and witty remarks, to name a few.
If you want to impress her with your intelligence, just be yourself and share your honest thoughts on topics like the meaning of life, your purpose in life, and your thoughts about the universe. Don’t try to pretend to be someone you’re not.
10. Love and Relationships.
Ah, love. The much-awaited topic. Love can be a sensitive subject as it may trigger negative emotions, but it can also potentially lead to a positive outcome. To broach the topic, you can start by telling a story about your ex. If she seems comfortable talking about it, you can continue the conversation.
However, if she seems hesitant or unwilling to discuss it, don’t force the issue. Most importantly, this is where you have the opportunity to learn if she is single or in a romantic relationship.