Getting a girl you like to talk to you is only the first step. The next is to rack your brain to come up with interesting topics to talk about to keep her hooked in the conversation. Knowing how to talk to a girl and the best things to talk about is a crucial skill for every guy.
Talking to a girl you like is different from talking to one of your buddies. When talking to your buddies, there seem to be endless things to talk about: sports, movies, girls, and more. But when it comes to talking to girls, things can get tricky.
Unless you’re a natural talker, it is likely that your nerves and anxiety will get the best of you and you won’t be able to think of anything to say especially if you really like the girl. And that’s precisely the last thing you want to happen: to sit in awkward, uncomfortable silence as you watch the opportunity to talk to her slips in your fingers.
How to Start a Conversation With A Girl You Like
The first thing you should focus on is how to initiate a conversation with a girl. The key is to start a conversation on the right foot if you want to leave a good impression. The best way to do it is to practice an indirect approach.
Initiating conversations indirectly works best because it will let her know that you’re interested in having a conversation without sounding too personal and aggressive, which makes it easier to connect with her.
Below are three effective indirect approach techniques to start a conversation:
- Comment and ask about something she’s holding or wearing. For instance, if she’s holding a drink at a bar, you can ask the name of the drink, how she likes it, and if she has any good drink recommendations for you. If you’re at the beach and you noticed she’s wearing a unique hat, you can ask her where she got it from and tell her it looks great on her. It’s all about paying attention to the details, even the smallest ones.
- Comment on something that is happening around the both of you at the moment. For example, if you’re at the bar and there is a band or music playing, comment something about the singer’s voice or the music that is being played.
- If you’re both waiting for the bus, you can make a comment about the traffic. Look around you, what is happening around the both of you at that moment can be something to talk about.
- Spill out a compliment. This technique is a little more direct but it’s an effective way to initiate a conversation with the girl you like. Just be mindful of the compliment you’ll say. The key is to steer clear from obvious compliments that most guys would be giving her. Instead of giving her a compliment about her face, talk about the color of her eyes. Instead of complimenting her skin, talk about the tattoo on her shoulder. You need to be creative and unique with your compliment, it should be something she doesn’t hear often. That way, you’ll spark her interest.
Asking the Right Questions
Just like how knowing the right things to talk about is essential, knowing how to ask the right questions is equally as important. Instead of asking questions that could potentially lead to one-word answers, stick to asking open-ended questions to prolong the conversation.
Instead of asking “Do you like surfing?”, you can ask her “What are your hobbies?”
Instead of asking “Do you like this song?”, you can ask her “What kind of music do you like?”
Instead of asking “Have you seen the Game of Thrones?”, you can ask her “What movies or series do you like?”
Asking open-ended questions invites her to tell a story. And if she’s telling a story, that usually implies that she’s comfortable around you and is willing to open up, which is a good start.
10 Interesting Topics That Keeps A Girl Hooked In The Conversation
Okay, so you’ve got her to talk to you. Now, you just have to relax and let the conversation flow and run its course. Talking about the weather is getting tiresome and old, so what exactly should you talk about? Coming up with things to talk about can be tough, but we made it easy for you by listing 10 amazing topics that spark great conversations!
1. Food and Drinks
This one works best if you’re at a bar or at a restaurant. If so, going for this route early in the conversation is a good strategy. Talk about the food and drinks right in front of you. Ask her what she got and how she likes it. Tell her what you got. Ask her to help you decide on a dessert.
This is a classic but still works effectively. A person’s hobbies play a big role in who they are as a person. There is no complex formula to this, just go and ask her about her hobbies and tell them yours.
Who knows? The two of you might even have hobbies in common that you can enjoy together. If not, there’s no harm in trying out new things.
3. Aspirations and Goals
A person’s goals tell a lot about their personality. Ask her about her future plans, but don’t make it sound like a job interview. Remember, you’re trying to get to know her as a person, not as an employer looking for someone for a position.
So, asking her “Where do you see yourself in five years?” would be a wrong move. Also, be careful about sounding like you’re interrogating her as it will make it harder for her to open up to you.
A tricky topic to talk about, this one. But sooner or later, this one will come up for sure. So, why don’t we just get that out in the open and get it over with, right? But be careful, this one can be a sensitive subject. You don’t want to brag about work if you have a good job or you’ll only look arrogant.
At the same time, you don’t want to look down on yourself if you have a slightly less than impressive job role. Just tell her some details about what you do without mentioning the job position itself, tell her you to enjoy it (even if you don’t), and move things into her line of work.
5. Pets and Animals
Research study shows that most girls are fond of animals, especially dogs. It is also revealed that girls are more attracted to men who own pets. Dr. Deepak Jumani, a sexual health physician and counselor, claims that apart from physical attributes, a woman is drawn to a man due to his emotional traits like caring, compassion, concern for all, so it is true that a woman will find a man to be more attractive if he owns a pet.
This one is always an amazing topic. You can start by telling her a funny story about a recent travel escapade you had to make the conversation light. Then, you can start asking questions. What places has she been to? Where does she want to go next? Perhaps there are places that the both of you had gone to. If so, share your experience as she shares hers.
7. TV and Movies
You have to be careful with this one. You don’t want to sound like you have watched every single TV show and movie there is, because that will only make you look like a couch potato (who’s got nothing else to do). But, do ask her what she watches and what she’s looking forward to seeing.
Who knows? She might’ve seen some movies that you’ve watched. This topic may also be a good chance to ask her out to see a movie some time, that is if you dare try!
8. Conspiracy Theories
Who does she think killed JFK? What does she think really happened to Johnny Gosch? What are her thoughts on UFO and Bigfoot sightings all over the US? But whatever happens, don’t bring up the Flat Earth theory.
Sure, this topic is not for everyone, but it sure is very entertaining to talk about. You can never be right or wrong when talking about this, so there’s no reason to dread this topic. It is called conspiracy theories for a reason. Have fun sharing your thoughts and opinions.
9. Life and Universe
Okay, this is a huge subject, probably one you aren’t ready for. But this one can either make or break your chances of winning a girl over. Studies reveal that most women are attracted to intelligence. Now, that doesn’t necessarily mean you should have a University Degree, Masters, or Ph.D. Intelligence comes in many forms: well-thought opinions, enlightening insights, witty remarks, and more.
Just tell her about your honest thoughts: what you think life is about, your purpose in life, and your thoughts about the universe. Be your true self, the last thing you want to do is to pretend to be someone you’re not.
10. Love and Relationships
Ah, love. The much-awaited. You were waiting for this one to come up, weren’t you? Love can be a sensitive topic as it may trigger negative emotions. But this topic can also potentially lead to a positive outcome. You can start by telling a story about your ex.
If she follows through, that means she’s comfortable talking about this topic. Otherwise, don’t force her to talk. Most importantly, this is where you get the chance to know if she’s single or if she’s in a romantic relationship and was just being friendly with you.