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9 Tips to Flirt Over Text Messages

Make flirting easier for yourself, and flirt anywhere at any time, by learning how to flirt over text messages.

Alex Smith By Alex Smith Reviewed by Lea Bennet

Congratulations! You finally have the phone number of the girl you’ve been eyeing for a while. Now, you might be wondering how to make the most of this opportunity. Should you give her a call, send a text, or wait for the right moment? The answer is simple – master the art of flirting through text messages to open the lines of communication successfully.

Flirting is an art that requires skill, personality, good timing, and clever use of words. It can be challenging, especially when trying to capture someone’s attention with your moves. Fortunately, modern technology, such as text messaging, has made flirting easier. Now, you can easily flirt with someone you like by just sending a few text messages. Once you’ve initiated an engaging conversation through texting, everything else becomes a blissful walk in the park.

Flirting, in its simplest context, refers to socializing with the opposite sex as a way of expressing attraction and fascination for someone. However, flirting does not necessarily equate to love or serious intentions. People often flirt with someone they like to amuse themselves, boost their ego, or validate their self-worth.

If you want to learn how to flirt over text, you need to find creative ways to use words. Your ultimate goal is to grab the person’s attention and make them respond to your messages consistently. The key is to make them enjoy exchanging text messages with you and look forward to your conversations.

Reasons to Flirt Via Text Messages

Reasons why to flirt over text messages.
Reasons to flirt over text messages.

Let’s explore why it’s essential to learn how to flirt through text messages and why it matters in this modern age. Here are the top reasons.

1. It makes flirting much easier.

Sending a text message to someone you like is far more manageable than talking in person or calling them on the phone. You can compose a simple or impactful text message and send it without enduring a nerve-wracking situation.

Moreover, talking on the phone can be too direct, especially if you just got their phone number. This makes flirting via text more practical and ethical.

2. It enables you to choose your words carefully.

Text messaging allows you to construct your message in any way you want. You can edit and filter the content before sending it, minimizing the risk of making a wrong move or saying inappropriate things while flirting. More importantly, you can take your time thinking about how to keep the conversation substantial instead of accidentally blurting out meaningless words that you’ll regret later.

3. There is no “dead air”.

Adding to the pressure of flirting with someone face-to-face is dealing with “dead air.” Those sudden bouts of silence where you don’t know what to say next can create tension. Often, the discomfort becomes overwhelming, and you’d rather vanish. As a result, what might have been a fantastic moment for you turns into a cringe-worthy scenario.

With text messaging, you don’t have to worry about awkward silences because there’s no pressure on the situation. You can take as much time as you want in composing your flirtatious messages, with no risk of getting tongue-tied.

4. It gives you time to get comfortable.

Flirting over text messages allows you to feel more comfortable with someone before taking things to the next level. It gives you enough time to adjust and warm up to each other and figure out if there’s a connection. Over time, the thread of text messages between you can help you determine if there’s a chance for things to advance.

5. You can flirt with the person you like anytime.

If you know how to flirt over text messages, you can practically flirt with the person you like anytime. You don’t have to stick around and wait for them to pass by, so you can make a move. A few clicks on your phone are all it takes to send a meaningful message, making every moment the right moment to get playful and giddy with your crush.

Texting adds amusement and satisfaction to flirting. Waiting for the other person’s reply builds anticipation for what’s coming next, making the experience far more engrossing. The ability to reread your conversation helps you establish a connection with the person. In the end, you’ll find yourself reading between the lines as you wait for the next text message to pop up on your screen.

If you want to master the art of flirting over text and start wooing that person you like, there are a few steps and pointers you need to know to get it right. Remember that your success depends on how the other person responds, or if they respond at all. Ultimately, flirting is more than just a playful exchange of words. It’s meant to be fun, engaging, and satisfying.

How to Flirt Over Text Messages

1. Have a good introduction.

Just because you’re merely flirting with someone doesn’t mean you can say anything recklessly. You have to be selective with your words to encourage the person you’re texting to reply. A good introduction is friendly, pleasant, and polite. Start by introducing yourself and stating your motive for texting.

Here are some example:

  • “Hi, this is Bryan. We met at the party last Saturday. I hope you remember. I was just wondering how you’ve been?”
  • “Hey, it’s Marvin, from the gym. I hope it’s not a bad time because there’s something I need to ask you.”

2. Text something funny or catchy.

Flirting over text requires wit and charm. To keep things interesting, try texting something funny or catchy. While pick-up lines and jokes are great ideas, feel free to get creative and come up with something unique. Use words creatively and put your sense of humor to good use.

Here are some examples:

  • “I hope you’re not tired. You’ve been running through my head all day.”
  • “I followed my dream, and it led me to you.”
  • “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”
  • “Where were you last night? I saw you in my dreams.”

3. Tease, be playful, and have fun.

If you’re looking to take your flirting to the next level, a little teasing and boldness is recommended. Flirting should be fun and playful, unless you’re seriously considering a romantic relationship. In that case, it’s perfectly acceptable to state your assumptions and become a bit suggestive. Just make sure to be mindful of what you’re texting and avoid crossing any lines. Flirting is only satisfying and worthwhile if both parties are enjoying it.

Here are some examples of flirty but non-offensive text messages:

  • “Let me guess. You were wondering about me, right?”
  • “You miss me! I’m so touched.”
  • “My instinct tells me that you’ve been thinking of me as much as I’ve been thinking of you.”

4. Incorporate moments of honesty and sincerity.

Flirting isn’t just about being playful and funny all the time. Honesty and sincerity are just as essential to make it beneficial for both parties. Remember that a worthwhile exchange of text messages between two people is like a real conversation. It should be constructive and genuine, even if your intention is to flirt. Therefore, sharing moments of profound and heartfelt conversation is acceptable – something that goes beyond flirting.

Here are some examples:

  • “How was your day?”
  • “Did you enjoy your time with your family?”
  • “How did you spend your holiday?”
  • “I’ll just grab a quick bite. I’ll text you in a while, ok?”

5. Learn how to make a good comeback.

Flirting with someone who has a way with words can be so much fun. They can make you smile aimlessly and make the conversation lively and entertaining. So, if you’re flirting with someone over text, try to come up with a winning comeback that infuses humor into your wordplay.

A good comeback statement is the surest way to make an impression without even trying hard. However, be careful not to overdo it or make sarcastic remarks. Instead of being offensive, aim to be quick-witted and full of personality.

Here are some examples of clever comebacks:

  • Suppose they get the impression that you’re stalking them: “I’m not a stalker. I’m a researcher. You just happen to be my subject.”
  • If they tell you they’re not in the mood: “You’re not in a bad mood. You simply need Vitamin ME and Me Therapy.”
  • If they tell you they’re good at something: “I, on the other hand, am good at Algebra. I can replace your X, but you won’t have to figure out Y.”

6. Be sensitive and tactful.

Flirting makes sense in many ways, but making a person fall for you just to boost your ego is an entirely different thing. Regardless of how flirtatious and playful you are, never play with another person’s feelings. You can be humorous, witty, and playful as much as you can. However, you should know where to draw the line, especially if you have no plans to pursue them and you’re fooling around.

If they’re nice to you, don’t take advantage of it. You can tease and flirt with them, but be sensitive and considerate enough not to lead them on.

Here’s what to keep in mind when flirting over text.

  • Be encouraging and act like a friend.
  • Respect each other’s relationships and feelings.
  • Avoid giving the other person the wrong impression.
  • You don’t have to be consistent. Flirting is just for fun.
  • Timing is always important.
  • Making him/her fall for you is not your end goal.
  • Avoid getting too personal.
  • Give space if you feel that you’re going too far.

7. Play it cool and be a good sport.

When you’re flirting with someone over text, it’s important to remember that you can’t always expect things to go your way. Rejection, snappy remarks, or no reply at all may happen. When this occurs, be a good sport and play it cool. Don’t take it personally, and don’t try to get back at the person. You’re not in the right position to feel bad about it, so don’t waste your time seeking revenge.

Being pushy won’t help you redeem your wounded pride and ego. If your attempt to flirt with someone is rejected, it’s best to move on and not take it personally. This is your cue to stop texting them and leave things hanging for now.

Stop texting if:

  • There is no reply to your text.
  • You feel unwelcome.
  • Your attempt to flirt is rejected.
  • You get a rude reply.
  • You’re asked to stop.

8. Understand that flirting has a limit.

Most people who enjoy flirting over text are amused with the exchange of messages. It builds up excitement and anticipation over what’s coming next. No matter how much you’re enjoying it, be aware that there are certain limitations you need to be aware of. Even if the person you’re flirting with welcomes your waywardness, jokes, and playful behavior, avoid texting obscene and lewd messages. Don’t trigger embarrassment and discomfort as you go along.

There are different ways to tease and excite another person if they are playing along with you, but being vulgar is certainly not one of them.

Here are some examples.

  • Have you ever missed someone so much that you want to grab them from your daydream and hug them for real?
  • Everything feels so much better knowing that I have you, and I can text you anytime.
  • I can’t help but smile whenever I see your name on my phone.
  • This is me sending you a virtual bear hug.

9. Know when to stop.

Flirting can make you feel good about yourself, as long as you know how to play it right. Therefore, if you have no intention of catching feelings for each other, it’s important to know when to stop. The exchange of text messages can often become too mesmerizing that things could eventually go out of hand. The next thing you know is that either one is way past the flirting phase and is expecting something more.

If you have no intention to take things to the next level or are not ready for anything serious, feel free to lie low and give some space. Flirting doesn’t have to escalate into a real relationship. However, it also doesn’t give you the right to take advantage of another person’s feelings.

Final Thoughts

Flirting over text is a fun way to interact with someone you like. By nature, it’s meant to be light and cheerful. As long as you’re clear with your intentions and you understand the limits, there is no reason for you not to enjoy it whenever you can. Keep in mind that flirting should be respectful, enjoyable, and playful. With the right balance of humor, sincerity, and wit, you can successfully flirt over text and create meaningful connections with those you’re interested in.

About the Author

Alex Smith Image

Alex Smith, a co-founder of Chat Line Numbers, is a California native who pursued his undergraduate studies in Computer Science at the University of Los Angeles. While spending a year studying abroad in Spain, Alex discovered his passion for writing. Upon his return to the United States, he continued his career as a VoIP developer on Chat Line Numbers while also collaborating with the online blog. Alex is an enthusiastic programmer with a talent for writing.