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Why He Is Ignoring You

by Thessa Phillips

Maybe something happened between you two, causing him to ice you out and ignore you, or perhaps he is ignoring you to send a different message. Whatever the case may be, it’s no fun to be ignored, and you probably want to get to the bottom of it quickly to resolve whatever the issue could be. Keep reading to discover why he may be ignoring you and what you can do about it.

Different Ways He Can Ignore You

Depending on which of these ways you’re being ignored, it may affect you more than the others. Learn the different ways he may be ignoring you, below.

  • In person. If he’s ignoring you in person, you can tell a lot more and sooner than if he’s ignoring you over text, for example. It’s the worst way to be ignored because of how obvious it is. There’s probably something seriously wrong if you’re being ignored in person, and you definitely want to have a conversation with him and see what’s going on sooner rather than later.
  • On the phone. If he’s ignoring you on the phone, it could be really annoying because you can’t see his facial expressions or body language to help you guess where his mind is at a little bit more. It also makes the phone call very difficult and uncomfortable because, unlike in person, all you can do is wait for them to respond. There’s not much you can get distracted with, and it’s not like you can happily sit in silence. It’s clear that something is going on, and it definitely will not be a productive conversation.
  • Through text. This is the easiest way to be ignored because you might not even realize he is ignoring you. You might even confuse it with him being busy and not thinking anything of his silence. It’s not a very effective way for him to ignore you if he is trying to send a message by ignoring you, but it’s definitely the way that will hurt less.

Reasons He’s Ignoring You

Common reasons he might be ignoring you.
Common reasons he might be ignoring you.

There are a number of reasons he could be ignoring you, below are the most common ones.

He isn’t interested in you.

He could be ignoring you because he’s not interested in you, and he either doesn’t know how to tell you or doesn’t feel the need to communicate it. For example, imagine you met at a bar, and you just didn’t really hit it off right away, or he simply wasn’t attracted to you or interested in pursuing you.

He doesn’t really owe it to you to explain that he’s not interested because you just met, so he decides to ignore you to send the silent message that he’s not interested.

He doesn’t want a relationship.

Maybe you’ve been going on dates, and things have been going well, so naturally, the next step would be to transition into a relationship. However, he’s not interested in a relationship at the moment, so to avoid having that conversation, he chooses to ignore you.

Although that is a terrible approach on his behalf, if you’ve been going on dates and he suddenly ignores you, you may have an answer as to why he is doing so.

He wants to break up.

Another terrible reason to ignore someone, yet so common. He may want to break up, but he doesn’t know what to say, how to have the conversation, how to confront you about it, or he doesn’t want to see you hurt. So instead, he ignores you and puts it off, so he doesn’t have to deal with the issue he is having.

He’s angry.

This is probably the most common reason to be ignored. If he is angry with someone, life in general, or you, he might choose to ignore you because he’s just not in a good mood. Although if it has to do with you, you should talk about it eventually, give him time and space to get over his angry emotions so he can address the problem with a clear mind. Doing so will increase your chances of avoiding a fight and finding a solution.

He’s trying to play it cool.

Maybe he’s really into you, but he doesn’t want you to know that yet, so he’s trying to play it cool, however, it’s not going so well for him because it actually seems like he’s ignoring you. Try to look for other signs that he’s actually really into you to determine if this is the case.

He thinks you were coming on too strong.

He could be ignoring you because you came on way too strong. Try not to overdo it, even if you have a big personality. That doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t be yourself, just make sure you’re aware of what you’re saying and your actions so they don’t cause him to ignore you.

He thinks you’re not interested.

As a result of thinking you’re not interested in him, he may want to act like he’s not interested in you, so he chooses to ignore you. So if you really like a guy, make sure you’re letting him know that you are interested in him, to avoid this confusion and to avoid all of the mixed signals you might be accidentally sending each other.

He thinks you’re too clingy.

Similar to coming on too strong, you might be too clingy, and in an attempt to avoid your clinginess, he ends up distancing himself so much to the point that he is ignoring you. It’s okay to be a little bit clingy if you like someone, it lets them know you’re interested, but don’t overdo it to the point that it becomes annoying.

He’s actually shy.

You may be interpreting a shy personality as him ignoring you, when that’s not the case at all. Before assuming that he’s just ignoring you and doesn’t really care, ask yourself if he’s shown any signs indicating that he’s just a shy guy.

Signs you could look out for are him being quiet with everyone, not just you, or maybe him not really taking the initiative to have a conversation with you but still engaging in conversation when you initiate the conversation.

He’s really busy.

This is likely what is most easily and frequently confused with being ignored. He might actually just be busy. Often you may think that he’s ignoring you because he’s taking too long to answer or because he only texts you a few times throughout the day.

In reality, he’s probably just busy, and his intention isn’t to ignore you whatsoever. Instead of assuming you’re being ignored, ask how his day was at the end of the day. He’ll probably tell you all about it, and you will be able to confirm that he was just busy and not intentionally ignoring you.

He’s talking to other people.

He could be ignoring you because he has someone else on his mind. If you’re in a relationship, this is not okay, and he definitely needs to talk to you about it instead of just ignoring you. However, if you’re nothing serious and you’ve only gone on a couple of dates, don’t be surprised by this behavior. It’s probably his way of letting you know he’s not interested in pursuing you anymore because he’s after someone else.

He’s hiding something.

He could be ignoring you because he’s hiding something he doesn’t want you to know about. This could go one of two ways. He could be hiding an exciting surprise and to keep the surprise a secret, he is ignoring you so he doesn’t accidentally tell you about it, or he’s made a terrible mistake or has done something bad that he doesn’t want you to find out about, so he ignores you to hide it better.

He’s avoiding something.

Similar to ignoring you because he is hiding something, he could be ignoring you because he is avoiding talking to you about something that may not be easy to tell you. If you notice other strange behaviors that may indicate this, you should have a conversation with him to find out what’s going on.

What to Do if He’s Ignoring You

What to do if he is ignoring you.
What to do if he is ignoring you.

As frustrating as it may be, sometimes there’s not much you can do when he’s ignoring you. Below are some suggestions of a few things you can try.

Give him space.

He might need space to gather his thoughts, get the courage to talk to you and tell you what’s really going on or have any angry emotions pass. Give him space, and he might confront you about whatever is going on, so you don’t have to confront him.

Confront him about it.

If giving him space doesn’t help, you should confront him about whatever you think could be the cause for him ignoring you. It’s not easy, but you don’t deserve to be ignored forever, so someone is going to have to make the first move.

Ask him to talk.

If he hasn’t been ignoring you for long, and you don’t think it’s something really serious, you can probably avoid a confrontation and simply ask him to talk about things.

Reassure him.

If you know, he’s been going through something stressful or hard times, he is probably ignoring you because he’s not in the best mental state, and he doesn’t want to accidentally take it out on you. The best thing you can do in this situation is to be patient and understanding and reassure him that everything will be okay.

Things You Should Ask Yourself

Below are a few questions you should ask yourself if you feel like he is ignoring you.

  1. How long has he been ignoring me for? It’s important to determine how long he has been ignoring you for. Has it been a couple hours, has it been over a week? This will indicate the severity of the reason he is ignoring you and may help you determine why he is ignoring you more easily.
  2. Does he ignore me all day? If he is ignoring you most of the day, most days, and he has a full-time job, that’s probably why. However, if you know he has a lot of free time during the day, still doesn’t reply to your texts, and just ignores you, then something else is going on.
  3. Is there a fair reason for him to be ignoring me? Perhaps you were being too clingy, you were mean, or he’s upset with you for some reason. These are all possible causes for him to ignore you. You should give him some space and address the situation as necessary, whether apologizing or talking about what happened.

Wrapping things up, he could be ignoring you for many reasons, and hopefully, with the list included in this article, you can discover why he is ignoring you. Remember, it might not always be as serious or complicated as it seems, and he could simply be busy with something else. The best thing to do is to let him know you felt ignored and talk about what was going on.

About the Author

Thessa Phillips Image

Thessa Phillips is a passionate writer working as a regular content creator for theChatlineNumbers and also has a part-time job at a relationship counseling company in San Francisco, CA. Thessa's passion for writing and experience in the dating industry has led her to create many viral articles on dating tips and tricks. Aside from writing, she loves watching movies and enjoys going to the theater.