One of the biggest challenges guys face when it comes to meeting girls is self-confidence. What if she makes fun of me? What if I embarrass myself? What if I screw up and she gets angry? What if her friends tease me? What if I freeze up mid-sentence?
We’ve all asked these questions before, and unfortunately, there’s no easy answer for them. The truth is, confidence is something that we build up over time. It’s not something that we can just turn on and off. You could even say that confidence is a kind of habit.
And that’s what we’re here to solve. So if you want to be confident around girls then the following tips will help you down the right path.
1. Prepare a Good Line
First things first, you will need to prepare a good line. A good pick up line doesn't always have to be unique but it needs to be simple and funny. You will also need to pick a line that you can deliver easily.
If you can't come up with a good pick up line on your own, go on the internet and look for one. There are hundreds if not thousands of websites that offer pickup lines and relationship advice, and you should use them accordingly.
2. Work on Your Body
You must build up your body. There's really no going around it. Buff guys are not only more physically attractive, but they also look healthier and more confident. This isn’t to say that you need to be buff and chiselled, but you will need to at least be able to show off your body without feeling embarrassed in the process.
Also, if you're confident about your body, you will be more confident around girls. So if you think your body is a little soft and flabby, go pick up those weights and build up your muscles.
3. Be Prepared for Rejection
Be prepared for rejection. There will always be situations where the girl you're talking to will reject or even make fun of you. These rejections are always painful but you can avoid most of the pain and embarrassment if you're prepared for them.
Also, being prepared for rejection will allow you to steel yourself against the emotional heartache of being rejected. A lot of men are so invested in a particular rejection that it shatters their self-confidence and they never try to meet girls again. So don’t allow yourself to be emotionally brittle.
Remember, if you’re prepared for the worst-case scenarios, and you know that you can move on from them, then you’ll become more confident with women. After all, if you’re prepared for the worst then you’re prepared for everything else.
4. Find the Right Location
Location matters. For example, some guys find it easy to talk to girls at a club or at a noisy environment, while others prefer quiet places with limited sounds. Know which place you're most comfortable with and go there.
For example, you can meet women at parks, clubs, shops, fairs and more.
You should also remember that your setting can add or reduce your confidence. For example, you’re more likely to feel confident at a familiar setting than at a strange place where you don’t recognize anyone or anything. So always pick a place that you like and go meet girls there.
5. Dress Yourself Up
You're more likely to be confident with women if you dress yourself up properly. You should even expand your wardrobe if you want the best results. A new shirt, new shoes, and a jacket that compliments your body will not only make you more confident, they can also make you more attractive. So go buy them.
6. Bring a Wingman
Some men find confidence when they have other guys backing them up. So if you just can't seem to find the courage to talk to women on your own, go ask one of your friends to be your wingman.
They can back you up, give you advice and pull you out of embarrassing situations. You're also more likely to be confident when you know one of your friends has your back.
Also, your wingman is not emotionally invested in talking to women. They are there to back you up, which means that they can keep you calm and focused whenever your emotions get the better of you.
7. Pick the Right Type of Girl
There are many types of girls, and you should only speak to those whom you're comfortable talking to. For example, you're more likely to have a good conversation with women who share your interests and hobbies. Not only do you have more topics to talk about, you will also feel more confident talking about things that you actually enjoy.
Furthermore, it’s also worth mentioning that some women have their own preferences. So if you know what a particular girl’s preferences are, you’ll be more confident when you talk to her.
Fortunately, learning a particular girl’s tastes and preferences is easy enough. Most women develop social signals through their hair, accessories and their activities. If you’re patient, you’ll be able to identify these signals easily, and they will help you talk to women more confidently.
8. Observe How Other Guys Do It
Let's face it. Some guys are naturally good at talking to girls, and you can learn a lot by observing them. For example, you can learn a lot about charisma and self-confidence by observing how confident guys carry themselves, as well as how they smile and how they move around.
So if you think you can't be confident with girls on your own, look up videos of pick up artists or generally confident guys talking to women. You can find plenty of these at YouTube, but there are also pick up artist sites that offer videos of guys who demonstrate how to talk to girls.
If you want to observe the real deal, go to a club or bar, and observe how some of the guys there pick up girls or talk to their girlfriends. You'll be surprised at how much you'll learn just by observing other guys.
Additionally, you can look at male celebrities and how they chat up girls, or at least look at how they dress. The idea behind imitating other men is that if you don’t feel confident talking to women then imitating someone who does is the next best thing.
9. Make a Plan
Let's say that you have successfully talked to a girl you like. What next? If you can't answer this question then you're in trouble. Guys who plan things in advance are not only more confident with women, they are also more successful at life in general.
So before you talk to girls, make up a few plans. Do you ask them out to date, ask them for a number or do you play it cool and leave without asking for anything?
You can find all kinds of pick up plans on the internet, and you can use these to enhance your ability to talk to girls. They can also make you more confident because guys who know what they're doing are less likely to freeze up or make mistakes than those who don't have any plans at all.
10. Work on Your Charisma
Are you a charismatic guy? If the answer is 'no' or 'maybe' then you better work on your charisma. There are many ways to do this. One good exercise that you can try is to talk in front of an imaginary camera, as though you're a newscaster. You can also imagine yourself making a video that millions of people on the internet will see.
If you are confident with your performance then you are ready to go out there and speak to women. If not then you will need to keep working on your delivery.
You can also try talking in front of a mirror. Talking in front of a mirror is an old trick but it works, and it will also allow you to correct your posture, facial expressions, and body movement. So work on your charisma. You may not be as attractive as celebrities but if you can express confidence and strength then you’ll do fine.
11. Learn the Truth About Female Psychology
Finally, you will need to understand female psychology. Women behave differently from men, and you need to recognize what these differences are, otherwise, women will always confuse and discourage you.
For example, women have a higher disgust response than men, and this is because of evolutionary pressures. So you need to be extra clean whenever you talk to them, simply because most of them may have a higher standard of cleanliness than you do.
Furthermore, single women are more likely to travel with their friends than single men. When a guy talks to a woman who is with her friends, he is not just talking to her. He is also talking to her friends, and their opinions will influence their friend's reaction.
So before you go out there to talk to women, understand how they think and prepare accordingly. What you learn will make you feel more confident in the long run.